Where do you hang out? Because yes, it matters…

I know I’m not your mom. Nor am I trying to fill the parental roles in your life.

I hear that collective sigh of relief…       Thank goodness for that.OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

I’m just the abstinence/renewed abstinence cheerleader who kind a invited myself along on your journey, to be supportive and encouraging and cheer you on. OR if you’re still riding the fence about the matter of saving sex or further sexual experiences for marriage, I’m here to nudge, prod, insist, and yes, even plead, with you to wait. My mission is to convince you that saving sex for marriage MATTERS.

So, back to the issue of where you hang out. Let’s be very clear.

Where you go—as in locations, events, or structural buildings including

bedrooms or empty houses—matters a lot.

We covered that in “The WHERE of Saving Sex for Marriage.” The list of places that can get a couple in trouble is looooong. And what’s going on at those places matters too because “safety in numbers” isn’t a sure bet. But you get all that.


 Now I want you to think about a different kind of hanging out… like I bet you spend a percentage of each day online, chatting and making connections on Facebook or Twitter or Tumblr or Instagram…. Or any number of other online hang outs. I love the opportunities afforded by the super age of technology that surrounds our daily lives. In an instant I can connect with someone tens of thousands of miles away. With the click of a few keys, I’m privy to the very latest in medical science breakthroughs. Pretty cool.

Chances are high that music holds a fairly significant place in your life. Whether you’re a fan of YouTube or Spotify or Sirius or Zuneimage (1) or iTunes or get your music fix from the trusty, old standby the radio, getting your fill of exactly the style, the rhythm, the beat you love is easy. Music can relax the body, clear the mind and sooth the soul. Ah, the gift of music…


And then there’s T_DSC2023V. Or Netflix. Or Hulu. Or Amazon Prime Instant video. Or Redbox. So many choices! A far cry from the 3 TV stations available where my brothers and I grew up, 4 if we counted PBS which we didn’t. When I was a teenager, a local FOX station upped our viewing options to 4 / 5. Wow… Although I don’t watch much TV now, I like having access to LOTS of choices. And recording our favorites to watch anytime we want—awesome.

Access to limitless knowledge. Amazing

So many listening and viewing options. Cool.

Almost endless possibilities thanks to technology. Awesome.

Yes, amazing, cool AND awesome as long you and I understand a couple critical things.

All of these oh-so-cool“hang out” options have the power to impact lives in a HUGE way.

Every “place” we choose to spend time will influence and mold our character and values, shape our thinking and decision making skills and impact our morals and values. The mindset of our favorite “hang-outs” can’t help but seep into our very hearts and souls.

That whole power/influence/seeping can propel us where we want to go OR lead us in the opposite direction…fast.

The choice is yours.

No one makes you visit inappropriate websites. No one forces you to listen to suggestive music. No one threatens your life if you skip the sexual-innuendo-laden movies and dramas.

Those choices belong to you alone.DSC_0390_Iván_Melenchón_Serrano_MorgueFile

And don’t for one second argue “that stuff doesn’t affect me.” That’s hogwash, pure and simple. It affects everyone to some degree. You really wanna give it a shot just to see how much it messes with you? I sure hope not.

Your brain has the incredible ability to record, remember and dwell on things. Don’t fill it with stuff that contradicts the way you want to live your life.

Choose to hang out where the power, influence and seeping effect will strengthen your values, your character, and yes, your commitment to wait for sex.

Yeah, places like that exists. Are you surprised? Check out this really cool YouTube video with a young man’s very honest response to the lies our culture spews to get you to think waiting for sex has no purpose. It does matter.

I’ve uncovered a myriad of web-based resources that passionately support and encourage a commitment to abstinence or renewed abstinence. Lots of Facebook groups and several blogs and organizations—all dedicated to energizing commitments to save sex for marriage with unflinching honesty and practical day-to-day tips for a real shot in the arm.

Check out the tabs/pages listed across the top of this blog.  AWESOME ORGANIZATIONS! notes organizations that champion a commitment to abstinence and offer support via resources and connections. CHECK OUT THESE GROUPS links you to lots of Facebook groups that rally around waiting for sex. Hang out here for instant connections to others committed to saving sex or additional sexual experiences for marriage. On the ADVICE FOR THE JOURNEY page, you’ll find links to great non-fiction books and articles. And remember the WAITING MATTERS READS page I wrote about in my last post that promotes abstinence-friendly fiction.

Surround yourself wifile3571273353222th like-minded people. Fill your heart and mind with truth and inspiration.

You CAN win the battle for purity. Arm yourself for victory with every available weapon. Take advantage of every person, place and thing that can help you. Because saving sex for marriage matters.