It takes time . . . to process the secrets, the decisions, the truths hidden for decades. Just give them time. Despite having complete confidence in the truth of these words, giving this advice to adoptees hoping to connect with …
Category: A Doorstep Baby’s Search for Answers
Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 10 – Another Big Bro and Cousins Galore
“So, when are you going back?” I lost count of how many people asked when we planned a return visit to Maine, where our immediate family had marveled in the beauty of an east coast autumn while spending time with …
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A Tribute to my “Real” Parents
My mom used to get miffed when people would say how wonderful she and dad were to adopt four children. “We weren’t wonderful,” she’d insist, no attempt to disguise the irritation in her voice. “We were selfish. We wanted a …
Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 9.5 – Hovering in between
“Mrs. Steury, do you have a sister?” In typical kill-some-time-in-study-hall fashion, a high school student tossed me a random question. “No, I don’t,” came my fast reply. Breath. “Wait, wait. YES, I have a sister.” I now had the attention …
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Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 9 — “Maine in October”
“Come to Maine next fall,” urged my “new” brother Alan as his visit to Indiana wound down, in September of 2017. He had traveled a thousand plus miles to meet us, the half-sister and family DNA had linked to his …
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A Cemetery Field Trip
August 10 found my daughter, grandson, and myself heading north on a field trip of sorts. Armed with a plethora of supplies, our mission was to spiffy up the family gravestones on the twenty-eighth anniversary of my biological mother’s death. …
Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 8 — Dear Birth Mom . . .
Dear I. M. M., How do I begin a letter to you, my “first mother”? Hi, it’s me. The baby girl you gave birth to in 1963, now all grown up. Seems as good an intro as any other, don’t …
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Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 7 — Aunt Donna and Cousin Honey
February 21, 2017, began like any other day, but by 1:30 p.m., the day lost its ordinary status when a message on our Ancestry.com account alerted us to a new, very close DNA match. With a few clicks, we determined …
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Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 6 — The reunion’s over . . . what now?
Even now months after our return from the 35th anniversary/family reunion/Hawaiian vacation, the memories of those first days and weeks back home are vivid in my mind. The trip home was uneventful. No mechanical issues or missed connections. The quiet …
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Meeting the Bio Family: Chapter 5 – Making up for lost time
If you happen to know me at all, you’re already aware that I’m a planner who prefers to have a plan in place all the time. I’m generally not a fan of “play it by ear” anything. Especially not something …
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Beth Steury, Author 